Make America America again

It’s the night before the 2020 presidential election, and I’m feeling oddly calm, all things considered. The news and my social media feed alike are full of anxiety-inducing news: rising COVID numbers! The threat of election day unrest and voter intimidation! The possibility of a contested election! Trump might win, Trump might lose: we might not know for weeks or months, and even if Trump loses, he might not ever leave!

My current sense of calm isn’t confidence; it’s more like fatigue. After four years of following every Tweet and headline, I’m resigned to whatever happens tomorrow and the days after.

I’ve already voted, and I’ve done everything I could these past four years to stay engaged, pester my elected officials, rally the troops, and get out the vote. Now, on Election Eve, it’s all over but the waiting. I know who I want to win, and I know what’s at stake if my preferred candidate loses. But right now, on Election Eve, everything comes down to the results in a handful of swing states. I wish that weren’t the way things worked, but I didn’t make the rules.

On Election Night 2016, J and I were so hopeful Hillary Clinton would win, we chilled a bottle of champagne to celebrate. This year, we don’t have any champagne, and we aren’t expecting a clear outcome on Election Night. I hope that Trump loses–the polls suggest he will–but this time around, I won’t be surprised if the polls are wrong. Whoever wins the election, and whatever mayhem might happen afterward, the work of citizenship will continue. For now, I’m resting up for whatever comes next, not knowing exactly what that will be.