I taught the last of my Spring semester classes on Thursday, so yesterday I took a break from my grading piles to meet A (not her real initial) at a mall cineplex to see Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret, which was as good as the book we both grew up on.
A and I have been celebrating the almost-end of semesters with root beer for more than fifteen years, at least. This tradition is so entrenched, we selected a movie venue not because it is equidistant between us, but because it’s about twenty minutes from our regular purveyor of fried seafood and ice cream.
The movie was wonderful, and equally so was the conversation A and I had afterward. Are You There God is about many things: periods and boys and bras, for sure, and spiritual quests as well…but both the book and movie are also about female friendship.
The movie more than the book depicts the frustrations of Margaret’s mother, Barbara, who quits her teaching job when the family moves to the suburbs, and it also highlights the loneliness of Margaret’s grandmother Sylvia, who in one heartbreaking scene quietly crosses “solve crossword puzzle” from a daily to-do list whose only other item is “dust.”
Happily, by movie’s end Margaret learns the value of true rather than fake friendship, and both Barbara and Sylvia find new passions: Sylvia by saying “yes” to new love, and Barbara by (eventually) saying “no” to soul-crushing PTA tasks.
My favorite aspect of the film is that it both begins and ends with scenes of spontaneous girlhood joy. Much of becoming a woman is, frankly, a hassle, as Margaret learns when she tries on her first bra then admits she can’t wait to take it off. (“Welcome to womanhood,” Barbara knowingly intones.) But among the headache and hassle, there are moments of sweetness, whether that involves jumping into a pond at summer camp or driving an hour or more for lunch and a movie with your bestie.
Hoarded Ordinaries 
May 7, 2023 at 2:55 pm
Always a relief when a movie or TV show passes the Bechdel Test. I’m kind of a troglodyte and moron about this sort of thing, but even I recall getting sick of what happened on one of my favorite TV shows back in the day, “24.” Somewhere around Season 7 or 8, the show introduced an awesome new female character: Renée Walker (Annie Wersching, who recently passed away from cancer). Walker was smart, tough, competent, steely-eyed, and—I admit it—easy on the eyes. I had high hopes for her character arc. But only a few episodes later, I saw that the writers had basically turned her into a simpering submissive whose existence revolved around Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland, the protag). Every other line spoken by Renée was some version of “But where’s Jack?” or “What does Jack think about that plan?” It was so disappointing to see such an initially cool character get turned into, well, the Anti-Bechdel. With that in mind, I’m always happy to hear of movies and shows that pass the Bechdel Test as you seem to be implying happened with “Are You There, God?” I’m glad you enjoyed the film and your tradition-time with A (not her real initial, but A could mean “Awesome”).
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May 8, 2023 at 10:35 am
Over the years of root beer meetups, we used to tell ourselves to get us there, ‘just keep going.’ Somehow the film got that, too – making it through the day with the blisters in the loafers, making it back to the next summer at camp, making it through the millions of felt stars. It all passes. It’s not that there won’t be another slog ahead soon, but eventually, there will also be root beer and ice cream. Again. (And it works for the drive, too. Just keep going.)
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